This wasn't a good day to start with. Shaw Feng reminds me to think of the pay cheque when things get bad at work. I enjoy dressing up so I guess that's where this job comes in fine..a chance to dress up to come to KLCC. I recall the time when SF brought me to The Weld in 1994, before he left for Australia, and being terribly awed by how the ladies dress for work. Never seen those power dressing or the smart garbs among the 'factory' crowd in Butterworth, even though a few stood out. I shall learn to live in the present. Enjoy each day. I could be looking back, if I get so lucky, at this period and wondered why I had not savoured every moment.
But it is so hard some days.
On moments like this
I just want to stay for a while
With no goodbyes to say.
And yet have the strength to walk away
with a wave and a smile.
And nary a care for
what lies beyond today.
Thursday, April 12, 2007
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Someone Knows
Some days, the grind of working is what it's described as -- a real slaving away with nothing much to achieve. Some days it feels like there's nothing to look forward to except for that pay day, which comes pretty early here, by the 22nd or the 24th most months.
On days like this, I think, why buy more clothes, why want a new home, why get a more expensive car. Why increase my liabilities and be tied to this job, this ingratiating place, the irritating boss.
And I get through days like this thinking about the money that comes in at the end of the day. Hence it irks me if anyone thinks that money comes falling out of the sky for me. I work hard for the money. I take on lots of nonsense before I get to enjoy what I earn. How dare anyone suggest money comes easy to me. Well, today, this aptly came on the Daily Bible Verse site. How coincidental is that? God knows! ;)
You may say to yourself, "My power and the strength of my hands have produced this wealth for me." But remember the LORD your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth.
Deuteronomy 8:17-18a.
I hand it all to God then. He knows and He has a plan. Just as He has a plan for Woan, whom I miss terribly these days.
On days like this, I think, why buy more clothes, why want a new home, why get a more expensive car. Why increase my liabilities and be tied to this job, this ingratiating place, the irritating boss.
And I get through days like this thinking about the money that comes in at the end of the day. Hence it irks me if anyone thinks that money comes falling out of the sky for me. I work hard for the money. I take on lots of nonsense before I get to enjoy what I earn. How dare anyone suggest money comes easy to me. Well, today, this aptly came on the Daily Bible Verse site. How coincidental is that? God knows! ;)
You may say to yourself, "My power and the strength of my hands have produced this wealth for me." But remember the LORD your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth.
Deuteronomy 8:17-18a.
I hand it all to God then. He knows and He has a plan. Just as He has a plan for Woan, whom I miss terribly these days.
Monday, March 26, 2007
Too Much Information
..can be dangerous.
Kayrin yesterday went into the operating theatre for the first time, with a pebble up her left nostril. A yellow one, about the size of those giant-sized kidney beans.
I just broke down when the anaesthetist knocked her out with general anaesthesia. She was so trusting, breathing into the mouthpiece as told by the nurse, garbed in her little green gown. She wanted to know why she's in green while the rest of us were in blue. Her curiosity amused everyone. Must be her curiosity too that got her to stuff that pebble up her nostril.
It all began at about 12:30 p.m. for me. For Shaw Feng, it started earlier. They were already in Sunway Hospital, with ENT specialist, Dr. Koay Cheng Boon, being summoned there.
Dr. Koay couldn't remove the pebble after a few tries, and decided that Kayrin needed GA to be able to have the offending object taken out. That started our wait for the procedure to take place at 4 p.m., about six hours after her breakfast in order for her to digest her roti canai.
It was a wonder to see her open her eyes after the surgery, and to immediately thank and wave away the anaesthetist, Dr. Tan. The cheeky girl, upon being wheeled back into Room 510, pronounced herself famished and asked for food. She sat on bed munching Jacob's cream crackers, keeping it all to herself, then moved over to the sofa to be with daddy. While eating, she asked, "Where are we going next?".
And my explanation of why this happened is, it began on Saturday, March 24. Kayrin woke up sniffling so we immediately shepherded her to her paediatrician's, where Kayrin insisted on no jab and no nose drop. Dr. Wong, ever patient, took out a diagram of the nose, mouth and ears, explaining that there are holes in the nose for the medicine to go in.
This, I think, prompted the little girl to want to `explore' her nose! After all, she's been playing with pebbles for months and months, since we had the fish pond installed in the little garden patch last year. Well, a little knowledge could be dangerous.
Thank God we could say that Kayrin recovered well. Though Shaw Feng figures he's now got a bit of a cold, something he caught when trying to suck out the pebble from Kayrin's nose.
Kayrin yesterday went into the operating theatre for the first time, with a pebble up her left nostril. A yellow one, about the size of those giant-sized kidney beans.
I just broke down when the anaesthetist knocked her out with general anaesthesia. She was so trusting, breathing into the mouthpiece as told by the nurse, garbed in her little green gown. She wanted to know why she's in green while the rest of us were in blue. Her curiosity amused everyone. Must be her curiosity too that got her to stuff that pebble up her nostril.
It all began at about 12:30 p.m. for me. For Shaw Feng, it started earlier. They were already in Sunway Hospital, with ENT specialist, Dr. Koay Cheng Boon, being summoned there.
Dr. Koay couldn't remove the pebble after a few tries, and decided that Kayrin needed GA to be able to have the offending object taken out. That started our wait for the procedure to take place at 4 p.m., about six hours after her breakfast in order for her to digest her roti canai.
It was a wonder to see her open her eyes after the surgery, and to immediately thank and wave away the anaesthetist, Dr. Tan. The cheeky girl, upon being wheeled back into Room 510, pronounced herself famished and asked for food. She sat on bed munching Jacob's cream crackers, keeping it all to herself, then moved over to the sofa to be with daddy. While eating, she asked, "Where are we going next?".
And my explanation of why this happened is, it began on Saturday, March 24. Kayrin woke up sniffling so we immediately shepherded her to her paediatrician's, where Kayrin insisted on no jab and no nose drop. Dr. Wong, ever patient, took out a diagram of the nose, mouth and ears, explaining that there are holes in the nose for the medicine to go in.
This, I think, prompted the little girl to want to `explore' her nose! After all, she's been playing with pebbles for months and months, since we had the fish pond installed in the little garden patch last year. Well, a little knowledge could be dangerous.
Thank God we could say that Kayrin recovered well. Though Shaw Feng figures he's now got a bit of a cold, something he caught when trying to suck out the pebble from Kayrin's nose.
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Flab
I've banished all talk of confidence, especially after making my way to the gym yesterday and finding bulges all over when squeezing myself into a pair of exercise pants I had bought not long after having Kayrin.
I wish I could snap a picture and paste it next to one of the three computer screens I stare at 10 hours a day. That'd be a sure-fire way to stop me munching in times of dealing with bosses and conference calls.
Or I could be fired for indecent exposure.
I wish I could snap a picture and paste it next to one of the three computer screens I stare at 10 hours a day. That'd be a sure-fire way to stop me munching in times of dealing with bosses and conference calls.
Or I could be fired for indecent exposure.
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Ironic
Being in the 30's can be quite fun most days. Being in my 30's means I have garnered the confidence to wear what I like, made enough money to allow some frivolous shopping and at the same time, realized that some `wants' can easily fade from my memory once the bags, shoes or clothes I deemed necessary are out of sight.
I've also turned milder, less inclined to want to fight for everything but taking it more seriously that I recycle, save water, keep the air clean. Because I'm leaving this world for people I love, including my darling Kayrin.
But wait. I've now also garnered enough insight into people and seen enough
to be paranoid over young giggly girls fawning all over, mmm, who else, the other half.
It gets pretty irritating because I know what it's like, having been there. Young ladies love having men pay them attention, even if the remarks are laced with sarcasm and sweet criticisms.
How can it be that a confident lady in her 30's go through such insecurities, I ask! Maddening, indeed.
May be it's because at 30's and beyond, no one hardly gives the ladies in this age category a second look. Men, on the other hand, garner more side glances when they're in their prime, the 30's.
For all the confidence I declare I have, may be I'm less sure about myself than I was in my 20's. How ironic.
No, that can't be! That isn't me. I will not let it go that way. With Kayrin and Shaw Feng, I'll celebrate life every day.
I've also turned milder, less inclined to want to fight for everything but taking it more seriously that I recycle, save water, keep the air clean. Because I'm leaving this world for people I love, including my darling Kayrin.
But wait. I've now also garnered enough insight into people and seen enough
to be paranoid over young giggly girls fawning all over, mmm, who else, the other half.
It gets pretty irritating because I know what it's like, having been there. Young ladies love having men pay them attention, even if the remarks are laced with sarcasm and sweet criticisms.
How can it be that a confident lady in her 30's go through such insecurities, I ask! Maddening, indeed.
May be it's because at 30's and beyond, no one hardly gives the ladies in this age category a second look. Men, on the other hand, garner more side glances when they're in their prime, the 30's.
For all the confidence I declare I have, may be I'm less sure about myself than I was in my 20's. How ironic.
No, that can't be! That isn't me. I will not let it go that way. With Kayrin and Shaw Feng, I'll celebrate life every day.
Monday, March 05, 2007
Show-House Tour
We spent Sunday morning checking out show houses in Bukit Jelutong and Denai Alam. Not truly a house-hunting trip. Kayrin loves looking at model homes, the kind encased in plastic and placed atop a table, with the roof peeled off. She simply likes staring at them. May be because they are toy-like?
For me, this trip was to exorcise the need to `upgrade' to a bigger home. As Shaw Feng pointed out, it's just the three of us + a maid, so not much of a need for a huge home. That, of course, brings me to the current need: To clean up the house and unpack the last of three boxes from our move from Singapore in March 2005! Well, guess if we aren't moving to a bigger house, we need to make space within our current one. That means I have to clear my wardrobe of lots of clothes too.
At least the current home is `mine, not yours or yours,' as Kayrin would loudly declare. It doesn't belong to any bank, for that I'm happy to say.
For me, this trip was to exorcise the need to `upgrade' to a bigger home. As Shaw Feng pointed out, it's just the three of us + a maid, so not much of a need for a huge home. That, of course, brings me to the current need: To clean up the house and unpack the last of three boxes from our move from Singapore in March 2005! Well, guess if we aren't moving to a bigger house, we need to make space within our current one. That means I have to clear my wardrobe of lots of clothes too.
At least the current home is `mine, not yours or yours,' as Kayrin would loudly declare. It doesn't belong to any bank, for that I'm happy to say.
Missing You, Woan
Dear Woan,
We still miss you a lot. Some days, the pain of not having you around is less but some days, like yesterday and the day before, when we placed flowers at Nilai, it hits us really bad that you're not around with us. But it's OK, Woan, we know you're in a better place, a happier place, a more beautiful one. A place we all want to be in one day. We miss you so.
We still miss you a lot. Some days, the pain of not having you around is less but some days, like yesterday and the day before, when we placed flowers at Nilai, it hits us really bad that you're not around with us. But it's OK, Woan, we know you're in a better place, a happier place, a more beautiful one. A place we all want to be in one day. We miss you so.
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
4-Going-on-10
The little girl pirouettes after class. This was the first week of January, 2007. Since then, she has refused to don her kindy uniform or be brought close to the kindy across the home.Above: Kayrin flying kite at the playground in Bandar Kinrara.
Thursday, February 08, 2007
Birthday Girl
Kayrin turned 4 on Sunday..and the little girl knew right away she was four. Some weeks back, she declared to daddy's colleague that she was 3, but will soon be 4, and then 10.
As all mommies will attest, it's hard to believe the baby born crying is now beyond being called a baby, or even a toddler. She's now a pre-schooler.
The day mommy had you, Kayrin, is forever in mommy's mind. Mommy and daddy went to East Shore Hospital, more nervous than the front we have put on. It was then a flurry of activities, with Dr. Koh Lam Son puncturing mommy's water bag, and then a lot of calls to him as he let us ponder choosing the C-section he recommended.
As all mommies will attest, it's hard to believe the baby born crying is now beyond being called a baby, or even a toddler. She's now a pre-schooler.
The day mommy had you, Kayrin, is forever in mommy's mind. Mommy and daddy went to East Shore Hospital, more nervous than the front we have put on. It was then a flurry of activities, with Dr. Koh Lam Son puncturing mommy's water bag, and then a lot of calls to him as he let us ponder choosing the C-section he recommended.
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
Best Compliment
Kayrin has gotten very clingy and weepy these days, especially in the mornings when I'm about to go to work. It gets very exasperating but I've been happy to note that I've kept my patience.
There are rewards of having a kid, though. The sound of laughter from Kayrin as I play hide and seek with her, the squeals of surprise as I pounce on her all are priceless. Also, no one pays you the kind of compliment your kid does!
Yesterday evening, Kayrin was sitting on her bed, flipping through her big book of 20th Century Children's Book Treasury, when she stated her demand for the day.
Kayrin: I want a new mommy.
me: Oh, and where are you going to find one? What are you doing with her?
Kayrin: I want a new mommy who looks like you and don't go to work.
That was so touching. It tugs at my heart strings that this little yet-to-be-four kid already knows what it's like to miss mommy.
When you grow up, my little darling, you may understand mommy's predicament. Mommy gives us the lifestyle we have, with God's grace, of course. And hopefully I'm a better mommy because I go to work.
Mommy doesn't love you any less for going to work.
There are rewards of having a kid, though. The sound of laughter from Kayrin as I play hide and seek with her, the squeals of surprise as I pounce on her all are priceless. Also, no one pays you the kind of compliment your kid does!
Yesterday evening, Kayrin was sitting on her bed, flipping through her big book of 20th Century Children's Book Treasury, when she stated her demand for the day.
Kayrin: I want a new mommy.
me: Oh, and where are you going to find one? What are you doing with her?
Kayrin: I want a new mommy who looks like you and don't go to work.
That was so touching. It tugs at my heart strings that this little yet-to-be-four kid already knows what it's like to miss mommy.
When you grow up, my little darling, you may understand mommy's predicament. Mommy gives us the lifestyle we have, with God's grace, of course. And hopefully I'm a better mommy because I go to work.
Mommy doesn't love you any less for going to work.
Friday, January 19, 2007
More Than Once
Date: Jan. 18, 2007
Venue: Home
After dropping her half dozen pillows at the foot of the stairs, just before bedtime, Kayrin sought assitance.
Kayrin: Help, mommy, I dropped all my babies.
Me: Oh boy. OK, let me pick them up for you. Why do you have so many babies?
Kayrin: Because I got married many times.
Me: Did you go to school today?
Kayrin: No.
Me: Who not?
Kayrin: Because I'm too young. Young kids don't need to go to school.
Venue: Home
After dropping her half dozen pillows at the foot of the stairs, just before bedtime, Kayrin sought assitance.
Kayrin: Help, mommy, I dropped all my babies.
Me: Oh boy. OK, let me pick them up for you. Why do you have so many babies?
Kayrin: Because I got married many times.
Me: Did you go to school today?
Kayrin: No.
Me: Who not?
Kayrin: Because I'm too young. Young kids don't need to go to school.
Friday, January 05, 2007
A Learned Kid
Thursday, Jan. 4: Kayrin's second day at Sri Waja kindergarten. And she's all of 35 months old today!
Before class...
Mommy: Let's go to kindy, shall we?
Kayrin: No, I don't need to learn anything.
After tricking her into accompanying mommy to get her Chinese name written for the teacher, she got into her uniform and went across the road to kindy.
After class:
Mommy: So, darling, what did you learn today?
Kayrin: I learned everything!
Before class...
Mommy: Let's go to kindy, shall we?
Kayrin: No, I don't need to learn anything.
After tricking her into accompanying mommy to get her Chinese name written for the teacher, she got into her uniform and went across the road to kindy.
After class:
Mommy: So, darling, what did you learn today?
Kayrin: I learned everything!
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
Back Then
And back in March 2003, this was how the little lady looked like, at less than two months old. Mommy's baby's all grown up and is a pre-schooler now..even mommy can't believe it!Blowing the Candle
Nowadays, we celebrate birthdays in the bedroom! Well, the only place we're family on our own. This was daddy's birthday in July 2006.Kindergarten
Kayrin started on her first day at kindy today. Wow, what a milestone. Daddy accompanied her to Sri Waja, across the road from home. Literally a stone's throw away.
All my plans of sending her to a kindergarten down the road, up the hill, round the corner came to nothing. Goes to show that we can plan but only God knows what will come to fruition.
How wonderful that my little baby is now a pre-schooler. Daddy said she started singing "A-B-C" the alphabet song and then got the whole class singing along with her. What a leader!
All my plans of sending her to a kindergarten down the road, up the hill, round the corner came to nothing. Goes to show that we can plan but only God knows what will come to fruition.
How wonderful that my little baby is now a pre-schooler. Daddy said she started singing "A-B-C" the alphabet song and then got the whole class singing along with her. What a leader!
Little Boy Blue
Little boy blue
Come blow your horn
The sheep's in the meadow
The cow's in the corn
Where is the boy
Who looks after the sheep
He's under the haystack
Fast asleep
That nursery rhyme has been played continuously over a car journey, non-stop too, in the S40, and over and over again on the Bose Wave in the bedroom at bedtime on Kayrin's demand. She knows which track it is on the CD. Over the weekend, Shaw Feng skipped to Track 9 while driving, and the song `Rock a Bye Baby' came on. Kayrin promptly told daddy to "go back"a track. Sure stuns us that she knows where that track is on the CD. Ask her why she's so passionate about it, and her reply simply is: `It's my favourite.'
But, of course, my darling baby!
Come blow your horn
The sheep's in the meadow
The cow's in the corn
Where is the boy
Who looks after the sheep
He's under the haystack
Fast asleep
That nursery rhyme has been played continuously over a car journey, non-stop too, in the S40, and over and over again on the Bose Wave in the bedroom at bedtime on Kayrin's demand. She knows which track it is on the CD. Over the weekend, Shaw Feng skipped to Track 9 while driving, and the song `Rock a Bye Baby' came on. Kayrin promptly told daddy to "go back"a track. Sure stuns us that she knows where that track is on the CD. Ask her why she's so passionate about it, and her reply simply is: `It's my favourite.'
But, of course, my darling baby!
Kayrin and Cousin Ivan
Kayrin loves tagging after Ivan, and when on her own, will proudly declare that she has a cousin, and it's Cousin Ivan.Ivan, on the other hand, seems to think a three-year old can be quite a pest if the three-year old persists in following him around!
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
6817
Wei and I were there to close the door and shut the gate to the house, 6817 Jalan Sungai Puyu, at 9:58 p.m. on Dec. 23. The eve of Christmas Eve, and we cleared out the house, left it clean for the buyer. A home it was, a home where we grew up, played, cried and laughed. And now it's no longer our home. It was very sad to walk away but Wei and I are very glad we've found closure, doing what we had to do -- spring clean in less than 10 hours. Goodbye 6817.
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
The Juice of Life
Somewhere in Bandar Puteri Puchong, after breakfast on Sunday.
Daddy: Look at that lizard on the floor, Kayrin. I think it's half dead.
Kayrin: Why is it dead?
Mommy: Because it didn't drink its fruit juice in the morning.
Kayrin: Luckily I'm not dead.
Daddy: Look at that lizard on the floor, Kayrin. I think it's half dead.
Kayrin: Why is it dead?
Mommy: Because it didn't drink its fruit juice in the morning.
Kayrin: Luckily I'm not dead.
Disposables
We were nearing Bandar Puteri Puchong, in search of breakfast, when Kayrin started on a litany in the backseat of the A-class: `Why no pants, mommy, why no pants?'
No inkling what she was going on about, I started looking out of the window and around for something without pants.
She then tugged at the pink dress she was in and lifted the hem for me. Yikes! I had sent her downstairs after putting her in the dress given by Aunty KK's Erin following a shower. And all thoughts of putting her panties on disappeared from my mind after the early morning struggle of getting Kayrin to drink her fruit juice.
Taking a detour to Giant's Guardian outlet, we bought the smallest-sized disposable panties we could find. Thank goodness they didn't slide off Kayrin's little frame.
Shopping and breakfast took place as planned.
No inkling what she was going on about, I started looking out of the window and around for something without pants.
She then tugged at the pink dress she was in and lifted the hem for me. Yikes! I had sent her downstairs after putting her in the dress given by Aunty KK's Erin following a shower. And all thoughts of putting her panties on disappeared from my mind after the early morning struggle of getting Kayrin to drink her fruit juice.
Taking a detour to Giant's Guardian outlet, we bought the smallest-sized disposable panties we could find. Thank goodness they didn't slide off Kayrin's little frame.
Shopping and breakfast took place as planned.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)