Not Unhappy, Not Crazy

I haven't written for a while. I've been busy dealing with issues relating to a new home, to Kayrin not coping well with her Mandarin lessons at kindy. May be that's why I'm again battling another coughing fit. I've gone back and realized that I tend to fall ill in February and August. Is that when the weather changes? Is that when I get stressed out by changes in routine? Or just that I'm not getting enough rest at those times of the year?
I haven't written because I haven't been really mad or angry, or ecstatically happy. But that doesn't mean life is not great. In fact, life is good. I'm pottering on. SF was away last week, in Hanoi, and Kayrin and I appreciate his being home even more since then. He's a great parent. He participates in everything to do with Kayrin. OK, I still complain that he doesn't get up often enough to pull the duvet over her. He's an easier person to live with these days. When he gets angry with me, he stays angry for a much shorter period. That's something I really appreciate. I'm the kind to want to talk things through. And he keeps mum. So, you can imagine the stress when I want to talk AFTER a fight and he wants to stay quiet. Yup, it gets us into another fight. So, I'm trying not to talk right away. Not right then. And he bounces back faster, talking to me normally. That really eases the tension, because after a while of talking about other things, I don't feel the urgency to be the psychoanalyst in our relationship.
I'm happy with things now. I try not to think too far. I'm a worrier. Big time. But I'll try to manage with worrying about nothing for the moment. May your day have spots of worry-free time too.

Year of the Ox

31/01/2009
Originally uploaded by leechingshen

Here's Kayrin with our neighbour and her favourite little fella, Lukas. She adores him, thinks the 2-year-old is partly hers.

Kayrin's First Poem

The lunar new year started on Jan. 26, and I had a whole week and more to spend at home. It was a wonderful break, spent at home watching movies including "Ip Man," "Vicky, Christina, Barcelona," eating lots of yummy siew yoke (roast pork) and watching SF and Kayrin prancing around, wildly swinging their arms. The Nintendo Wii found its way into the home as Kayrin's birthday present.
The highlight of this relaxing week at home was discovering Kayrin's talent. She wrote a poem. She made it up as we were playing. It goes like this.
On a hot summer's day,
She played and played
Till her hands are gray
Then it rained
And she quickly hopped onto a train.

I helped her with the last line but to be writing a poem before she's even 6. Wow. I'm beaming with **pride**.

Pork Noodles

06/01/2009
Originally uploaded by leechingshen

Best pork noodles in the Klang Valley, SF and I says, is at the Hao Wan coffeeshop in Kuchai Lama. This bowl, filled to the brim with minced meat and lean meat, comes at just 4 ringgit. We've been going to this kopitiam for pork noodles for a whole decade. The coffeeshop doesn't look that great. Broken tiles and dirty drains outside. But for this bowl of kuey teow, SF and I will put up with the surroundings. We sneaked there for our breakfast after dropping Kayrin off at the kindy on the first day of school and she didn't bawl her eyes out.

Welcoming 2009

Another year, another milestone.
This year, I plumbed the depths of depression, and grudgingly accepted help to get me out of it. SF and the chest physician must have spotted things not right with me. Psychologist Paul J's help was invaluable.
This year, Kayrin turned five. And I have yet to give her a sibling. I alternate between telling myself to give up and to seek medical help before it's too late.
This year, she started kindy full time. Snagged herself her first boyfriend. And caught hand, foot and mouth disease (not from him).
This year, SF and I started our breakfast dates. Friday morning, with wantan mee and tea, we talked without the interference of a 5-year-old who must know everything.
This year, SF fulfilled his pledge to take his kid to Disneyland. We holidayed in Hong Kong, Kijal/Terengganu, Melaka and Penang. I realized then that home is best.
This year, we committed to the biggest debt we've taken on -- a new home.
This year, I marked the second anniversary of Woan's passing, and realized that I could still cry when I think of her.
This year, I resolved to be nicer to my mom. And stayed thankful for all my sisters.
This year, I had a new boss at work, and started thinking about cutting back on working hours. (No fault of the boss!).
This year, I learned to post photos from my mobile phone to blog, and how to touch up pix.
This year, SF and I fought hard. And loved each other to greater depths. Or at least I know I have.
This year, we ate more at home than ever because SF re-discovered the joys of cooking.
This year, we became brave enough to use our pressure cooker for the first time. First time since we bought it in Singapore in March 2005.
This year, I worked out resolutely at the gym and cut my cholesterol level to the lowest in three years. And I ate oat every day. Almost.
This year is coming to an end. In nine hours or less.
Next year, I want to nudge SF a bit harder to get to the gym, be a more-relaxed, lots-more-fun mummy and be happy!
Happy New Year, all.

Carousel

Carousel
Originally uploaded by leechingshen

Kayrin's favourite ride is at the IOI Mall. We hardly allow her to have kiddy rides but at this place, SF indulges her. For 2 ringgit, she gets quite a few rounds on this carousel that seems like something out of the movies.

Another Flat

21/12/08
Originally uploaded by leechingshen

When it rains, it pours. About a month after a big gash on one of the back tyres, I had another puncture. This time, I was at the office. A kind soul left this note on my car windscreen. Had I not seen this, I would have driven out of the office carpark. The tyre on the driver's side was flat as a pancake. Last round it was the other side's. AAM came to the rescue because the last round's tyre-changer was in a meeting. There was quite some heated exchanges between us because I was aghast that I had to find my way home after dropping the car at the workshop past 8 p.m. SF turned up in the end.
And thankfully, too, this time it didn't cost me the 1,031.90 ringgit like the previous incident.
It was a mere 32.55 ringgit, to patch what a screw had damaged. The amount had also included a 15 ringgit car wash, so all in, not too painful on my pocket during these recession-hit times.

No Sweat

Some ladies at the gym head off after their yoga classes without showers. I've always had to have a shower, no matter how late I am in getting back to work. With sweat dripping down at every class, how was I to just "dry-clean" this body and put the office attire on. Today, I broke with routine. I traipsed into a different instructor's class and Cedric isn't the kind to drive you through yoga as if it's a cardio session. He instead tells you to "meld your heart", "lengthen the sides of your chest."
Mind you, it was quite difficult to do that. Got to focus on every bit of your body to know what to do. But it was a sweat-less session for me. So, after washing the hands, applying some deodorant and combing the hair, I was back at work ;)
Certainly not as gratifying as a yoga class that makes me sweat, but still good enough to keep me from nodding off at the desk.

Concert

Concert
Originally uploaded by leechingshen

Kayrin's first concert. Held at the Sri KL private school's hall, we had a good laugh seeing kids gyrating to the Ketchup song on stage.

KLCC Park

KLCC Park
Originally uploaded by leechingshen

Kayrin and I had our girls' day out on Nov. 26, 2008, and she decided she wanted to go to the KLCC Park, her favourite in this city. The place was full of kids as it was the year-end school hols. This was taken via my Nokia N78, and posted via Flickr. Trying to get a bit tech-savvy here, as you can see. This isn't the original photo. It's been tinkered with, using Picnik.

Ogres

This morning, I started calling Kayrin 'ogre ogre.' What about mommy?, I asked. Mommy ogre, she replied. And daddy, I asked. 'Bad ogre.'

Tyres and Trains

It takes being on the other side of the pasture to realize that your side is often greener. Today, I had to take the train in to work after dropping the car at the workshop, following a tyre puncture last night, and boy, was I unhappy in the RapidKL two-carriage coaches. A lady kept coughing and snifling hard, right into my left ear. The snorting noise made by the young lady in her 20s was driving me crazy. I certainly didn't fancy catching a cold from her. What's worse, she was standing close to me and refusing to get the hint from my stares that she moves away because on the other side was a man. Now I appreciate my personal airspace in the A-class. And to think, I was grumbling each day about having to drive myself to and from work.
The car passenger side's back tyre took on a big gash last night. Must have been the pothole along the Bukit Jalil Highway. Damn DBKL. If I had more time, I'd be claiming the costs of the two 16-inch Continental 195/55 treads from them. Joe from Cycle & Carriage just rang. That would be 800 ringgit. Well, could have been worse. I could have been stranded, could have driven off the road.
Thank goodness there was Shaw Feng at home. I wouldn't fancy being the damsel in distress at the road side at 7:30 p.m., waiting for help on tyre change. I totally have no idea how to change a tyre. OK, I do. A bit. Jack the car up and remove the tyre and plug on a new one. I've never done it. May be there's a course I can go to. May be I should read the manual. Thankfully, Shaw Feng knows how. I know how to call for help. I rang the Mercedes breakdown service. But they couldn't come! Thank goodness for Shaw Feng. The poor fella, who had to work in the drizzle on the car porch last night, deserves a big hug. Or a big bowl of Hokkien mee.

HTC-Less But With Loads of Supplements

I lost my three-month-old HTC Diamond phone on Oct. 31, a nightmare. I inadvertently left it behind in my haste to get out of the gym. Realising my loss 3 minutes later didn't help. The phone had been switched off by the time I rushed back to the gym. But I didn't dare go on and on about it at home. It was, after all, a present from Shaw Feng. Normally, my way of getting through such stuff is to talk it to death. You know, where I berate myself, curse the thief, wonder how I could be so careless, thump my fist at the dishonesty of some people, then scold myself somemore, etc. You get the point. That's pretty cathartic. It exorcises the pain. This time, I kept quiet, telling myself that Paul the psychologist would ask me to ponder changing my actions. I thought it worked quite well. And then a weekend after the incident, Shaw Feng sarcastically remarked that my loss didn't seem to hurt me. Aha! He's so used to my nagging, talking self that a change like that seemed to indicate I wasn't upset with the loss.
Anyway, amidst the handphone loss, which happened in the gym, I won a prize for being one of the top three gym-goers for September and October. The prize -- loads of Blackmores supplements. Supplements are no replacement for a lost phone but at least it's some form of consolation. Now, time to get used to using a Nokia again.

Hand, Foot and Mouth Disease

Kayrin caught HFMD over the long Deepavali weekend and what agony it was for the little girl. My heart breaks. Ulcers lined the inner sides of her cheeks, dotted her tongue and were on her upper and lower lips. She cried out in pain everytime water came in contact with her.
It all started with Kayrin telling me over the phone, as I was driving home, that she was feeling sick. She threw up as soon as I arrived home at about 8 p.m. We brought her to a pediatrician's clinic (not her regular one), and she threw up twice more at the clinic. Suspecting it was stomach flu, the doc noted that she has lots of ulcers in her mouth plus quite a high temperature of about 39 Celsius. But with no spots on her hands or feet, he said it wasn't HFMD.
On Saturday, when showering her, I cleaned her tongue. Kayrin screamed in pain. That was really awful. Her fever seems to have abated that day. But by Sunday morning, she was in such agony that we brought her into the A&E at Sunway Hospital. The doc gave OralAid, a lignocaine mouth drip, paracetamol and told us to give her warm salt gargle. Wrong thing when her ulcers were so huge. Poor Kayrin didn't want anymore of the rise after I forced it on her twice. By Sunday evening, she had refused all food and drink. Her grandmother made her way home to feed Kayrin. That night, reading on the Web about HFMD, I realized that dehydration was the biggest enemy.
To feed Kayrin water, which she refused to even sip, we used a plastic syringe and `pumped' water into her mouth throughout the night. Deepavali (a Monday) was spent at home, catching up on sleep. By then, Kayrin was scratching her toes a second night.
Come Tuesday morning, I drove Kayrin to her usual pediatrician, Dr. Wong May Foong, who immediately diagnosed Kayrin as having HFMD and pointed out the spots/vesicles on her fingers and toes.
At the clinic was also Kayrin's classmate, Law Yen Kay, who also complained of pain in the mouth. The two of them were among the three who have caught HFMD in the class of Sakura B at Tadika Prima Ceria.
I've gone really paranoid as a result of Kayrin catching HFMD. I asked Ida the maid to wipe all doorknobs with soap, constantly clean the fridge handle, especially after Shaw Feng showed me an article on dirty hands and door handles.
Yesterday, Wednesday, Kayrin started asking for food again. A good sign. And she was ordering me to scold her daddy for being a bad guy. I shouldn't have married a bad guy, she said.

Overcoming Cough

Very happy that I'm almost winning the battle with this cough in a short period. Two weeks. Short for me because I've often battled cough for months. And this round, what works? I can't quite tell, but here's a list of what I did, with much encouragement, or scolding ;), from Shaw Feng.
1) Gargle warm salt water, more than three times a day during the worst of the cough.
2) Use Sterimar nasal spray morning and night.
3) Eat no deepfried food, no pears and no chicken and eggs. All advice from the TCM doctor. And yes, eat no vegetables during dinner.
4) Take garlic pearls, on the advice of colleague Ryan.
5) Get lots of sleep.
6) Avoid travel to Singapore for crazy weekend party (best decision made for me by SF this round).
7) Continue with gym routine as per usual. Actually, I stepped up my exercise quota, going for a second yoga class in a week.

Thank God for this quick recovery. And I avoided Singulair too. whoo-hoo!

Blast From the Past

Bruce Springsteen's `Dancing in the Dark' came on air this morning and I resolved to look up the lyrics when I drove into the office. That means going onto Google, typing `Dancing in the Dark lyrics', and pop here they are.
But I remember the days when I wanted lyrics. It means playing the cassette on dad's Aiwa player, with pen and paper ready, and fingers quick enough to go on the stop/pause-rewind-play button! Stop to write, then replay for bits I've missed or couldn't catch, then play again.
And if I wanted to listen to a song, it means calling in to Double RB the Australian radio station broadcasting out of Telok Air Tawar in Butterworth, or writing to Janet Ambrose of Radio Four or Blue Channel before that.
These days, it's not even about buying the CDs. It's "Sweetheart, please download for me" or You-tubing it.
What a change two decades made.

To Exercise or Not

When a cold strikes, I lie low. No exercising. No hitting the gym. Just meander around in the office and feel miserable.
This round, I've decided to try otherwise. That means still crawling to the gym, sweating it out on the cardio machines for about 20 minutes, my usual. OK, may be I've cut back a bit on the weights. Let's see how I fare this round. A longer recovery? A shorter one?
What do you do when you catch a cold? Break from your usual routine?

Short Break

Melaka always seemed a boring place to me. Too commercialized. Recently, however, I've been wanting to see Melaka again. I haven't explored enough. We took the opportunity to do that on Oct. 1-2, the Raya weekend. It coincided with Heng Hou and Ai Wei being in Melaka too. Ai Wei, whom we met for the first time, is a Malaccan and gamely took us to Amy's for Nyonya food and to Min Sheng Hygienic Ice Cream.
Amy's served up wonderful chicken pong-teh, we were told but they'd run out by the time we got there for lunch at about 1 p.m. Only complaint was that food was slow in being served. Kayrin kept asking for the arrival of food, a rarity.
Min Sheng's cendol was a real nice one to tuck into on a hot day. I'd say it's the best cendol I'd gotten in the southern part of Peninsular Malaysia.
Being in Melaka when a quarter of Malaysia and half of Singapore descended on it could be quite taxing if you aren't from KL. well, KL-ites have seen worse. What's worse than being stuck in a 500 meter underground tunnel leading from the KLCC carpark for an hour?
Kayrin, after many hours of enduring me pointing out ancient buildings and monuments to her, had this to say about Melaka: Why is everything so old in Melaka?

Princess for a Day

Kayrin saw a temporary studio at the lobby of the Giant hypermarket one weekend last month, when we were out shopping. She was adamant she had her glamour shots taken! We had to make our way back to that studio as it was too long a queue that day. Heck, I wouldn't be dragged into such shots as a kid. Well, my one and only time doing such shots were for the wedding in 2001. I must say I had fun. Now, to figure out how to upload those shots into digital beings and get them up here.
In the meantime, here's Kayrin playing princess. Shaw Feng and I were thoroughly amused she was so game at sitting through the experience.

Crocs

Kayrin got her first pair of Crocs from Singapore in 2005, before they were launched in Malaysia. Her pair, in fuchsia pink, didn't last her very long as she outgrew them quite fast. But that was the start of her love affair with Crocs. We've bought her no other shoes since then. Getting her second pair, the turquoise ones in Penang's Komtar, and the subsequent red Mary Janes in Isetan, we've gone on to accumulate pairs and pairs from her from Hong Kong, when I travelled there for my team meeting in 2007 and discovered that they are at least 30% cheaper there.
Crocs are great for kids. They are washable, and seeing how quickly kids dirty their shoes, they are a wonder. And there's no need to wear socks too. As a parent, that's a jump in glee for me. No need to struggle with finding a pair of socks and making the kid stick her feet out calmly while I'm already running late.